Where we left off at the end of the last month’s re-cap, I was just starting my solo stint in Malaysia. I had 6 weeks planned by myself: 2 in Kuala Lumpur and 4 in Penang.
If you’ve been following along, you’ll already have known that things didn’t exactly pan out this way.
I was a little bit nervous to be alone, but it made it better that D was with me in KL for the first two weeks, so the city didn’t seem so foreign anymore. We already had established the best way of getting around and our favorite places to go for food.
I feel like I need a picture here so I guess you can look at the view outside my window again!
I thought I would feel lonely, but I actually really enjoyed this time alone. I loved being able to do whatever I want and go wherever I want and eat whatever I want to without having to consider another person (such as not having to worry about finding places that suit D’s gluten intolerance!).
I liked being able to take my time and not being rushed out the door, just like I’m sure D liked not having to wait on me. I liked being able to stay up however late I want without being whined at that the light is bright or the mouse clicking is annoying.
After all this time of always being with someone, it felt good to be selfish for a while!
and I can have dessert for dinner if I want!
But I also wasn’t completely alone all the time. I’m making more of an effort now to meet locals as it always ends up being some of the best experiences. I had already mentioned at the end of last month that blog-friend CL came to take me around KL. And aside from him, I was lucky to make another friend (full honesty: through Tinder – don’t laugh, Tinder is great for meeting locals).
He took joy in showing a visitor around his city, from a sampling of the nightlife scene (crazy) to eating what is known as the best nasi lemak in town (super delicious!). Having this local connection truly made all the difference in my experience.
1. administrative building at Putrajaya // 2. nasi lemak at Village Park // 3. view of Petronas Towers from Skybar // 4. mosque at Putrajaya
But seriously, I know there are a lot of questionable people with less noble intentions on Tinder. Whatever you’re after, make your intention clear (for me: just looking for friends to explore with) and have a strict screening process. I feel lucky to have met a really cool person who allowed me to gain a deeper understanding for KL.
The beginning of February also marked a huge event: the passing of my grandfather. And with this news, I decided that Beijing with my family is where I needed to be. So I bought a last minute flight, packed up, and flew to the one place that will always be home.
February 8 – present: Beijing, China
What I love about coming to Beijing is… that even though I landed in the middle of a cold Beijing winter with a luggage stuffed full of tiny summer clothes, within minutes, I had all sorts of warm clothes lent by family & close friends. Now that’s what I call coming home. :)
The day I arrived in Beijing also happened to be the first day of the Chinese New Year. This would be the first time I have ever been in China for the holiday since moving out of the country. My mom had flown back a few days before me (my grandfather waited for her to get there before peacefully slipping into eternal rest) and this was also her first time back in China for CNY.
My grandfather passed away just before the holiday. Maybe you would think that this event would have cast a shadow over the celebrations. But if anything, we celebrated doubly hard to cherish the life and family we still have. This CNY marked the first year that our family was (mostly) reunited for the holiday and I know my grandfather, wherever he is watching, was happy to see all of us together.
Little tiny pictures with all my favorite people in Beijing!
1. family at CNY festival // 2. mom and aunty Qizheng // 3. me with some pretty fake flowers // 4. mom and I // 5. at CNY festival // 6. mom, grandma, and I // 7. lunch with the aunties // 8. family including my grandpa the dragon // 9. me and aunty Yuanhui (visiting from Japan, another hard to come by reunion!)
I wrote a post on the first seven days that you can read here. A lot of family time, friends reunions, and like any other good holiday, good food. :)
And then we said goodbye, on a beautiful sunny day with clear blue skies.
Soon after the burial, my mother left to go back to the States while I decided to stay on in Beijing for a while longer to keep my grandmother company now that she’s all alone.
After the excitement of Chinese New Year and the departure of my mother, my grandma and I quickly settled into a comfortable routine: park exercises in the morning, lunch, naptime, and dinner. Rinse and repeat. In the afternoons, she teaches me to make her specialty dishes. We always have something interesting to eat for dinner.
One thing that Chinese relatives really know how to do is make you fat. It still surprises me every time just now much food is ordered at restaurants or how many dishes are made for a “simple” dinner. Since everyone loves the monthly food collage, here is a mix of restaurant & home cooked dishes this month in Beijing!
1. homemade zhajiangmian noodles // 2. CNY feast with the whole family // 3. CNY reunion lunch with my aunties // 4. Oops, we ate fancy roast duck again…. this time at Quanjude // 5. the biggest bow of zhajiangmian I’ve ever seen // 6. homemade tangyuan // 7. best dumplings in the city // 8. homemade tiny steamed buns // 9. traditional Beijing sweet corn porridge
These days with my grandmother pass by quietly but I love and appreciate every day. Though I was raised by my grandparents in my early years, since the age of six we have lived an ocean apart, and naturally the distance does no good to maintaining a close relationship. Contact becomes relegated to a few minutes phone call every couple of months or so. Spending this much time with her would have been impossible in my adult life if not for the fact that I’m currently free to be wherever I want to be. My grandmother is getting on in years now too and I’m so grateful to be able to have this time with her.
Read here for a Day in the Life in Beijing!
What’s going on in March
I’m still in Beijing for over a week to keep my grandma company. I debated for a while where to go after this, but I decided that I will be going to – change of plans again – back to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia!! For a month!
I wasn’t lying when I told you guys that I wasn’t done with Malaysia. I guess I left so unexpectedly that I couldn’t shake it from my mind. There were still so many things I wanted to do but didn’t get to. And plus, I also still have a fat wad of Malaysian currency I didn’t get to spend (errrr… unless you’re a thief and reading this, I’m broke and have nothing). But the thing that really sealed this decision is that D has a friend who is going to be visiting KL, so he also wanted to go back to meet up with her.
But I’m going to be back in KL solo for a bit again before D joins me. In much the same way, I left so unexpectedly that I feel like I didn’t get to properly experience the solo time I had planned. I guess it’s true what they say about solo travel being addicting. ;)
How was your February? What are your plans in March?
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I was going to ask whether D would be joining you when you went back, but then you answered my question! I’ve yet to do my own solo trip, I was thinking about taking myself to Copenhagen for a few days just to see what it’s like, but I’m not too sure I’d enjoy it. I enjoy Kris’ company too much :)
I was surprised by how much I enjoyed being alone. I think it’s because after being with someone 24/7 for this long, it just feels so good to do whatever I want to do. Kinda like when the wife goes out the town, the husband plays :P. But it was also because he was with me in KL for 2 weeks so the city wasn’t new to me anymore. I think I would be really scared to go somewhere new all by myself and have to sightsee all alone! I hope you do take that trip to Copenhagen though and let us know how you liked it!
Firstly, that dessert photo – YUM!! :D I can imagine that the days with your grandmother are perfectly calm and tranquil, it sounds like a wonderful bonding experience. And, I’m so glad that you will still get to fit in the solo travel time. An exciting months ahead :)
Hehe that’s a french toast brioche with coffee ice cream and chocolate/rapsberry/crumbles. I had it 3 times! Haha! This time with my grandmother has been so wonderful that I’m sad about it ending soon, but I’m also looking forward to getting back out there :).
I’m so sorry to hear about your grandfather (And I’m also sorry for the lateness of this comment – I actually did see your earlier posts but never got around to commenting.) I lived with my grandparents when I was young and I’ve always been so close to them (they’re Chinese too!) I cannot imagine having to say goodbye ?
But it’s wonderful that you’re getting this time with your grandmother. I completely understand what you mean when you say “Spending this much time with her would have been impossible in my adult life if not for the fact that I’m currently free to be wherever I want to be.” I think this is a big part of why I’m rejecting my 9-5 lifestyle too – of course travel is awesome and I love the lifestyle but it’s also the only way to spend time with family (our close friends and family are spread across 3 continents!)
No worries Jennifer!! Enjoying your travels should be the most important :).
I think it’s really common in Chinese culture for the grandparents to take care of the grandkids! I lived with mine until I was 6 when I went to the States to be with my parents. I’ve only been able to visit every 5 years or so since.I totally agree that being able to spend time with family is an extra perk of this lifestyle! I’m really grateful for all this time I can spend with my grandma now in her older age. :)
Sorry to hear about your grandfather :/ But so glad you were able to spend so much time with your family. The photos are adorable.
Meeting locals sounds fun! That’s definitely something I’m bad at when I’m solo traveling…I tend to just keep to myself, which gets boring.
Kelly!! I was so excited to see your name back with a new website, but I guess I’ll still have to wait a while for that ;).
I didn’t really make an effort to meet locals until a few months ago (we were also traveling faster before). I made some local friends in Taipei and it was so fun. I think one them said that a lot of people use Tinder to make friends lol, so I decided to try that in Malaysia. Otherwise, I was afraid that I really would just hole up by myself in my room all day too. It’s really easy actually to meet locals, but it’s not easy to meet someone nice, so I think I definitely lucked out there!
Maaaybe not…I’m going to try to be back on March 21 :)
Yay!! Looking forward to it!
Sorry you lost your grandfather Anna, I lost mine a few years ago and even though it had kinda felt like a had already lost him to dementia a couple of years before that, it was still really sad. I haven’t been to Malaysia yet but the one thing I keep hearing from people over and over again is how amazing the food is. Enjoy!
I’m sorry for your loss too, Katie, but I know exactly how you feel. My grandfather has had Alzheimers for a few years already (he no longer remembered me the last time I saw him), so we all understand that his passing is really a blessing. He’s definitely in a much better place now. :)
Yes, the food in Malaysia is amazing!! I’m soooo looking forward to going back and eating there :D. I hope you put in your itinerary in the future!
I know your February was hard with the loss of your grandpa, but I know there are fun travels in store for you so that’s something to be happy about! :) The quality time with your grandmother sounds like it was wonderful and really good for both of you… especially with all the homemade food! How neat. And haha, “unless you’re a thief, then I’m broke…”! I feel like I usually start any travel recap posts with something along the lines of “we don’t have much money so we travel like locals” which is actually true. Robbers, beware, we’re broke! ;)
It’s been really really nice spending all this time with her! If I were still working in the US, I know this would never be possible. :) It’s fun learning to make the food too!
Haha not having much cash is usually the case for us too. But D is the only one of us to have an ATM card with no withdrawal fees, so I had him withdraw all the cash I would need in Malaysia before he left, lol!
Hey Anna! So good to catch up here. I love following your journey. It is so wonderful to come “home” and be showered with warm clothing and fattening food… and I’m glad you’ve gotten some quality time with your grandmother. I look forward to seeing what adventures you get up to in Malaysia! I’ve only been there once, and I was about 5 years old!
Hey Daisy! :) Beijing is feeling like home again more and more, especially after being here for so long back in my childhood home this time! It’s been so nice spending all this time with my grandma, but I’m looking forward to Malaysia again too :).
Hey Anna, seriously let us know if you’d like to hang out! We have totally fallen in love with KL and would love to go exploring anywhere in the city. We also have several local friends who are always up for doing something. (Aren’t local friends the best?! So cool you met a couple too!) We’re here til the end of the month :)
Yes! I will definitely get in touch with you when I’m back in KL (only a couple of more days now)!! I really do think that meeting locals make all the difference. I would love to hang out with you and your friends and get their inside scoop. :)
I’m happy you have this time to spend with your grandmother. My grandma used to live about 5 minutes away from me when I was growing up. Once I started college (and the rest of life), however, she moved a few thousand miles away, which makes me sad. It’s hard to squeeze in a visit at this point of my life, which makes it hard because I know she’s getting older as well.
I know… it’s so hard :(. I know how lucky I am to have this kind of life, but it’s times like this when I’m truly thankful for the freedom. Being so far away, we don’t always realize/think about how old the grandparents are getting. I hope you can find some time to visit your grandma, even if it’s only a week, I’m sure she’ll love that!
It’s cool that you’re still able to step away and appreciate what you have. I think when I was traveling, I started taking that for granted–especially since I never had a full-time, 40-hour gig like right now, haha. And yea!! I just bought tickets to fly out to see her in a few weeks, so I’m pumped :)
Yay!! So exciting! She’ll be so happy :). I know now how much grandparents really appreciate it when the grandkids make an effort to visit. :)