By the end of this month, it will have been an entire year that D and I have been traveling together. That’s almost a whole year of being in each other’s faces 24/7. I can’t believe we haven’t ditched each other in a foreign country yet.
Because we really get on each other’s nerves a lot most of the time. After so long of being together day in and day out, certain habits become increasingly annoying, and then we get excessively crabby with each other over inconsequential stuff.
D hates when I kick/step on him while walking, or when I ask him questions I can easily google, or when I leave the door open and let the AC escape, or when I blog or read on my Kindle app in bed while he’s trying to sleep.
I’m not as disparaging, but I hate that he’s such a bed hog. He argues that since he’s twice my size, he should get 2/3 of the bed. He’ll roll his body over until I’m relegated to only a tiny sliver of the bed, while he happily sprawls out. Many times, I’ll be rudely awoken in the middle of the night by him shoving me if I’ve encroached on “his space” during my sleep.
And don’t even get me started on his farts that make me choke and gasp for fresh air. He thinks it’s funny to purposely aim them towards me.
“You are so disgusting,” I’d say. “I can’t believe I love you.”
“And you’re just always right there, being all clumsy and annoying. For forever,” he’d moan.
Traveling as a couple and trying to create a life together is not all fun and games. And when you’re stuck with someone in just one room all the time, there is no escape.
A few months back, due to some weird happenstance, we found a crazy good deal on a two bedroom apartment on Boracay that was actually cheaper and closer to the beach than most single bedrooms. We quickly booked it, even though it was bigger than we need.
But towards the end of our time in Singapore, as frustrations with each other escalated, that extra bedroom started to look very attractive. And by the time we arrived on Boracay, we couldn’t wait to have some separation.
The first night was awesome. I set up my things in my own dresser and nightstand, sprawled out across the bed, blogged, and then read my book for as long as I wanted.
In the morning, we both agreed that we had one of the most restful nights in forever.
The second night was just as good. After staying up late reading to my heart’s content, I drifted off to sleep. The next thing I knew, my bedrooms lights were on and D’s frame filled the doorway.
“There are bugs,” he cried, sounding panicky.
“Hrmmmm?” I mumbled.
“There was a bug crawling on me! While I was sleeping! And there’s one out here too. A big one! Can you help me kill it?”
“Huh? What time is it?”
“A little after five. Just come out here and help me kill it!”
“No! Get out of my room! I’m going back to sleep!” I pulled the covers over my face.
In the morning, we dealt with the unwanted critters. We spent a lovely day exploring a local market, eating seafood, and swimming in the ocean. We were in sync again.
That night, D said he wanted to sleep with me in my room. “I’m scared of the bugs,” he admitted.
“It’s fine. They’re gone now.”
“Then can you come sleep in my room with me?”
“I dunno… I kinda like having my own room now.”
“But… I miss you…”
So I grabbed my pillows and moved all my stuff out of my room and into his.
Of course, as soon as we became a one-bedroom unit again, we hated each other again. I got mad at him for having the AC up so high that I shivered all night. And in turn, he yelled at me for lighting up the room with my laptop while he’s trying to sleep. But when I suggested moving back into my room, he adamantly rejected the notion.
“You can’t even last three nights without me,” I teased.
“I know!” D groaned. “This sucks! Is this love?”
Is this love? When you’re with someone 24/7 to the point where you can hardly stand each other, but the minute you’re apart, you want to be together again? When you’d rather deal with the a thousand little ways you aggravate each other, than not have them?
If so, then I feel so lucky that I’ve found it. And I’ll take all of it, every single irritating and stinky bit. :)
Love is a funny thing isn’t it? lol Kudos for spending THAT much time together! My husband works shift hours so we can go days without seeing each other… like ships passing in the night. But sometimes when go on vacation or have holidays where we spend more than a week together, it’s like whoa so this is what it’s like to see each other every day lol.
It must be hard to not see each other too! And then it must be weird to all of a sudden be with each other every minute. I’m sure that means you just enjoy that time so much more!
Haha! Yes, I totally understand and I appreciate how honest you are, even if other people don’t want to admit they sometimes feel the same way. ;) I definitely need my space and alone time, I think it’s key for a healthy relationship. I don’t mind when he needs it and he knows I need it. You guys are rocking it! Love is a fascinating creature that’s for sure.
Thanks Caroline! It’s definitely harder to get alone time when we’re out on the road with just each other. But sometimes, just being in another room for a few hours helps!
Aww, how cute and funny all at the same time! A year is a really long time so I can only imagine it must have been nice to spread out a bit. Also, I’m glad I’m not the only one who steps on their partner’s feet… Like everyday!! Oops!
HAHA! I do it like everyday too, and by now, he’s sooooo annoyed by that. And when that happens, I’m just like “yep, this is what it’ll be like for *forever*”
I always wonder how Pumpkin and I would be if we did any long travel together – even I annoy myself sometimes so I think I’d be quite hard work to be around all the time though I must admit that I’m only about a third his size and yet I’m a complete (inadvertent) bed hog! Does D mind that his flatulence comes up now and then on the blog?!
Lol!!! I think I must be annoying sometimes too. And I think in general, being with a blogger is probably very annoying for non-bloggers. Especially when he just wants to eat his food, but I need to take pictures first!
I had him read this before publishing, and he laughed at that part, so I didn’t take it out!
I don’t mind!
My husband Dan and I have been through exactly this when we were living in Greece and shared a room together. As much as we drove each other nuts, it was such a fun experience!
I agree! We spent so many months of just having one room. It can get seriously annoying. But I guess I know now that we would rather drive each other nuts than be in separate rooms. :D
Ohhhh I feel this. My husband & I have been together for almost every day for over a year thanks to travel/freelancing. I totally get the ‘OMG you’re so annoying I want to kill you’ yet still loving state of mind ;)
It’s seriously not easy to be together every minute of every day! We say we want to kill each other all the time too. I didn’t know the Russky worked from home in Russia too.
Oh man, this sounds just like my partner and I! Every time we relocate there’s a long period of time where it’s just us two, day in, day out trying to figure out our new city! As much as we get annoyed at each other, there’s also no other person in the world I would want to be doing this all with! Luckily for us, he travels a lot for work, so I get ‘me time’ to re-group often :)
Exactly! I still wouldn’t trade him for anyone else! I’m sure you miss him when he’s away at work, but I bet it’s nice to be able to just do whatever you want to do without having to consider another person!!
Hahaha I love this. It’s all so true…. and so irritating!
For sure. Having a boy can get so annoying. ;)
Haha – what a great post! I’m definitely the bedhogger in our relations – my man and I spent almost all day together too and I feel so lucky to be able to do it :)
That’s so true. We are lucky to be able to spend so much time together!
I think he’s a bed hogger, but he says I always sleep diagonally, lol!
Ha! I adore this post! xx
Thanks Amanda! x
Hehe, I love this! It reminds me a little of when we moved into our first apartment together, and the space felt so big. We were calling to each other to “find” the other in our 2 bedroom apartment. And then got used to it and enjoyed having some space (coming from a tiny one room bedroom). I think it says a lot that you guys have been together 24/7 for a year and have managed to work out all the conflicts that come with that. Love the pics too – you two are so cute!
I can’t believe we’ve been together practically every single day for almost a year too. We still have a lot of the same arguments we’ve had since month 1, heh. Hehe the pictures are what happens when I try to take a selfie of us. D hates taking pictures!
How’s your space in Paris? From my experience, Parisian apartments are tiny!
One of the hardest periods we’ve had as a couple was when we started traveling — we are so different, so when we had to reconcile everything from which way to cross the street (i prefer diagonal walking, sergey always goes straight) to major decisions such as how much planning ahead we need to do for the next destination (i love planning, sergey detests it) that led to us being majorly annoyed and grumpy with each other. We found our compromise middle ground and slipped into a rhythm, but it was touch and go there for a bit. Now when we fight or get annoyed we tell each other: ‘Doomed for forever.’
We are like complete opposites too! But he’s the planner and I’m not, at all. Sometimes, it’s like the only thing we have in common is a love for food, haha. And that is SO funny… we tell each other the same thing too. We’ll just look at each other and be like “yep, foreverrrrr”.
This made me chuckle, it can be hard spending so much time with someone! My hubbie is quite good but he splashes a lot of water around, I am training him not to though!
Suze | LuxuryColumnist
Haha! I think we gave up training each other to not do anything, and just put up with the annoying habits now!
The key is to train without the other knowing. Hmm, I’m getting hungry babe….
I love this post! I can relate to so many of the things you said and especially agree with your last two sentences. What an honest, great tribute to each other!
Thanks Katrina! It’s so funny how annoying our partners can be. But we still wouldn’t trade them for anything!
This is too funny! I love the back and forth here! And I love the last part. It’s so true that no matter who you are with, there are going to be things that drive you absolutely CRAZY, but its better with them then without them. And hey, everyone needs some space and private time every once in a while ….. as long as you realized you missed each other. That’s the point!
Yeah! It’s good to get a chance to miss each other, after so long of being together 24/7 everyday! Definitely makes us appreciate having each other more. :)
I love this post, and it is definitely so true! My husband and I have definitely learned that at time we need our space- enough so that while on vacations, we try to purposefully schedule some time alone. It helps us to enjoy each other’s constant, 24/7 presence so much more!
Some separate time on vacations is a good idea, because we don’t always have the same interests! I think that’s something we should do more often too!
Bed hog? It only seems that way because you sleep *cough* in the dead center of the bed. Have pics. Will post. Truth :)
Okay, now I know that’s a lie.
Yes! Love it such a funny thing! I’m so glad my bf and I now live in a 1 bedroom apartment now. After three years of living in a studio apartment and a year before that living in a room… we need the extra doors. There was nothing worse that arguing in a studio and wanting to storm off and ending up in the toilet because there is no other room with a door!
Oh my gosh, I can’t imagine being stuck together in just a studio for that many years! Most of the places we rent when we travel are just studios too, and yeah, fighting in one is the worst!! Whenever we do rent a one-bedroom, just having that one extra room makes so much difference!
Hahaha this was so funny and cute to read! You guys actually remind me of some very good friends that currently live in Australia. They’re together all the time and still disgustingly adorable. Personally, I don’t think I could ever be with someone 24/7… but also I’m not currently in a relationship. Ask me again later. PS: does he ever take any normal-looking photos? ;)
Haha nope! All our selfies look like that. He hates taking pictures with me. And I hope to god that we’re not disgustingly adorable in public!
YES. Meltdowns. I’m one of those people that needs time alone, if I don’t have it, then I’ll freak out one way or another. Not pretty. But being on the road that long, as long you two, yeah, bound to happen, thank goodness. Doesn’t it feel good to be normal? :P
Oh it gets hard and annoying! But as difficult as it is to be together all day for that long, I think we learned that we would rather be together all the time than not!
Aw, this was sweet. I have definitely been there! It was nice during our work-stays when we had different tasks to do and then could come together and share SOMETHING NEW at the end of the day. But then came long-term travel with no work-staying… but if you still want to be with each other at the end of the day, it is totally meant to be!
Notably, I remember my first “euro camping” experience at a film festival a year and a half ago when we camped for 5 nights in our tiiiiny little tent barely big enough for two bodies when it was above 80 F during the day (you know how warm tents get!) and were so sleep deprived from getting up early/staying up late to see films… and we still got on well. These “high pressure” and high risk for conflict are perfect scenarios to go through with your partner to see how you react together.
Omg I can’t even imagine that heat and then only having a tiny tent. When we were going through Europe, I remember it was SO hot and we were fighting all the time, sometimes even saying things like “we should just break up.” We’re both so bad when it comes to hot weather. If you can get on well in that situation, then you know you’re meant to be!
Cute photos! I’ve only had brief tastes of being together 24/7. The first time, I went a little crazy because I was working in China. My boyfriend visited for a month and basically lived in my pocket while I tried to get shit done. It was rough, but still awesome. I still get the urge for alone time pretty often, but then when he’s gone, I actually kind of miss him. Must be love!
Awww love is a funny thing! I bet the month your bf visited you in China was so special even if a bit annoying! I can’t wait to follow your married life! x
i love this post! i think it’s really hard to spend every minute together- i need my alone time! but when you’re traveling that’s hard to do!
Thanks Helene! I’m so honored that you came by!! I’ve been following you on Bloglovin for a while (sorry for being a creepy silent stalker) and I love your blog!
It’s definitely not easy to get alone time while traveling. We bicker over stupid things ALL the time, and we could be fuming mad at each other, but there’s nowhere to go!
I’ve just stumbled upon your blog, if you couldn’t tell from the barrage of comments!! But I totally get this. My boyfriend and I aren’t traveling together currently, but when we do…oh boy! We love each other so much but we both do silly things that annoy the crap out of each other. :) I can’t wait to follow your journey now that I have found this blog!
Thanks so much Amanda! So happy to have you along! We annoy each other SO much too, and I always wonder if other couples annoy each other as much!
haha oh I totally feel this! I live and work with my partner – we were long distance for a while but now we’re often together. Not gonna lie it’s weird to have the bed to myself if he goes on travels, etc. but at the same time I love it! Paradox of relationships :)